The Laker/Lutz News

Sunrise of Pasco

Helping others to end abusive relationships

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Melissa Dohme Hill — who nearly lost her life at the hands of an abusive ex-boyfriend — offered suggestions on how to help people leave abusive relationships.

Friends and families can help when a loved one is dating or married to an abuser, Hill said.

There are warning signs to watch out for, Hill said.

For instance, pay attention to whether your loved one:

  • Is drifting away from others — spending all of their time with their partner.
  • Is wearing long sleeves or other clothing to hide bruises.
  • ls constantly making excuses for their partner’s behavior.

“Often as outsiders, you will see the relationship as unhealthy before the victim will,” Hill said.

If a victim breaks their silence about the abuse, it’s important to believe them, she said.

Then, help that person to connect with a domestic violence victim advocate, she added.

In some cases, your loved one may not acknowledge the abuse, Hill said.

In those cases, friends and family members need to continue to keep an open line of communications and continue to offer support.

Your stance needs to be: You do not agree with the unhealthy characteristics and abuse, but you will be there for them, Hill said.

“Give them all the knowledge and support, and let them know that you’ll be there, you’ll be there for that 2 a.m. call,” Hill said.

Domestic violence safety plan
Before planning to escape and it is safe to do so, consider packing an “escape bag” and keep it in a place where the abuser is unlikely to find it.

Important items to include:

  • Birth certificates, social security cards, credit cards, cash, checkbook
  • Medications, important records, and insurance policies
  • Extra set of car keys, baby items (if applicable), change of clothes

(If you think the abuser might find the bag and attack, put their clothes in, too, and call it a “hurricane bag”).

After you leave the abusive relationship:

  • Get to a safe place. See if there is a friend or family member you can stay with. If not, seek a domestic violence shelter (For example, Sunrise of Pasco.)
  • Relocate. There are possible funds available through certified domestic violence centers.
  • Consider filing for a restraining order; do not drop the restraining order for any reason.
  • Change your phone number and service provider.
  • Change the locks on your doors, add locks to windows if needed, install security system with alarms, possible motion sensor lights outside.
  • Inform work, school, friends, family and neighbors of the situation (tell them to call 911 if they see the abuser, suspect suspicious activity, or hear screaming).
  • If you have children: Be sure to change pick-up authorization and inform your child.
  • Think of a code word to use to let family and friends know if you are in danger and unable to safely call 911.
  • Never agree to meet with abuser.
  • Report any attempted contact by your abuser to authorities.
  • Seek counseling through support groups.
  • Change services that are traceable (bank, credit cards, phones, doctors, daycares, etc.)
  • Take different routes when traveling (Vary your daily patterns or activities).
  • Consider entering Florida’s Address Confidentiality Program.
  • Protect yourself.
  • Be aware at all times of your surroundings (Carry mace, have keys between fingers, phone out and available to call 911, check around and under car).

Source: Hands Across the Bay’s Domestic Violence Division

Published March 11, 2020

Casino night will support Sunrise of Pasco

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Sunrise of Pasco, Domestic & Sexual Violence Center will present a Casino Night on April 13 from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m., at 4G Ranch, 22501 State Road 52 in Land O’ Lakes.

All proceeds from the fundraiser will go directly to benefit participants of Sunrise of Pasco.

The event will include a bourbon bar, appetizers, cigars, an open bar, blackjack, roulette, craps, bingo and slot machines.

Sponsorship opportunities are available ranging from $500 to $5,000.

Individual tickets are $150 and include the open bar, heavy appetizers, a free cigar or wine glass, live entertainment, casino games and $2,500 in ‘funny money’ to get you started.

To purchase tickets, call (352) 521-3358.

For more information about the fundraiser, visit SunrisePasco.org, or email .

Sponsorship forms also can be secured by calling the above number or using the website.

Published March 20, 2019

Girl Scouts rejuvenate Karina’s Garden

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Step into the garden behind the administrative offices of Sunrise of Pasco, in Dade City, and you’ll find a place where flowers, plants, butterflies and statuary offer a place of repose and refreshment.

You’ve arrived at Karina’s Garden.

Those visiting Sunrise of Pasco’s office in Dade City have a chance to spend a little time behind the building in Karina’s Garden, which has been rejuvenated by Girl Scout Troop 1263. (B.C. Manion)

The garden initially was established in 2008 to honor Karina Abdul, a former shelter director for Sunrise of Pasco who died unexpectedly at the age of 29.

Over the years, plants became sparse and weeds took over.

So, when Troop No. 1263, of Wesley Chapel, was looking for a way to complete the requirements for a Girl Scout Silver Award, giving new life to the garden seemed to be an ideal project.

The trio of Girl Scouts — Paige and Kaitlin Traboulay, and Alyssa Duran — heard about Karina’s Garden from Kelly Mothershead, of the Rotary Club of Wesley Chapel, who has worked with the girls on other projects.

“They decided they wanted to come in and transform this space. That’s what they did,” said Vicki Wiggins, director of development for Sunrise.

Follow the mulched path to find a relaxing seat on a newly installed bench, in Karina’s Garden. (B.C. Manion)

The Girl Scouts, their parents and other volunteers rolled up their sleeves and got busy. They ripped out weeds, built mulch paths, added pavers, painted fences, installed benches and added plants.

They celebrated the garden’s completion at a gathering in August. Besides the volunteers, friends and Sunrise staff members, local members of Karina’s family were there, too.

“The family was thrilled,” Wiggins said.

Wiggins is impressed by the volunteers’ commitment.

“They’ve been raising money for about a year. They came out. They took pictures and designed it all,” she said.

“Apparently, Karina loved butterflies, so they made sure they incorporated a lot of plants (that attract butterflies),” Wiggins said.

“They did a really great job picking out things. I think the parents worked as hard as the kids.

Paige Traboulay paints some of the detail work on a door, which creates an inviting focal point in the garden. (Courtesy of Roger Traboulay)

“They started the weekend after July Fourth,” Wiggins said. “Everything that you can see that’s not a weed, they’ve added.

“They put the pavers in. They put this structure here that has the birdhouse on it. They added the fencing here. They repainted the wall. They added the butterflies (decorations).”

Local artist Lisa Tesla volunteered her talents to give a new look to a dilapidated wooden door in the garden that had been covered in weeds and vines. Her artistry transformed the door into an inviting focal point.

Chris Wirt, of A All Animal Control of Tampa Bay, cleared the garden of two black racer snakes before the trio of scouts got to work.

Sunil Mohammed, of Totally Blu H2O, stepped up to provide garden tools.

A colorful birdhouse invites feathered friends to drop by and stay awhile in Karina’s Garden. (B.C. Manion)

Another volunteer, Karen Weiss, made the sign that credits the people who helped on the project.

Paige Traboulay said the girls began planning the project at the end of last year.

“We walked in the garden, and we saw how big it was and how much needed to be done,” said the 12-year-old, who attends John Long Middle School.

“We asked them what Karina liked. They said she liked butterflies, so we tried to focus on that. So, there’s a butterfly on the door, and there are butterflies on the fences.”

There are butterfly plants in the garden, as well.

Kaitlin Traboulay, who attends Land O’ Lakes High School, said the work was mostly done by her family and Alyssa’s family over the course of two weekends.

Thirteen-year-old Alyssa, who attends John Long Middle School, said it was hard work, and it was hot.

When they finished, she said, “I was especially happy because that meant no more bug bites.”

Alyssa Duran works on a planter in a garden at Sunrise of Pasco in Dade City. (Courtesy of Roger Traboulay)

Paige added: “After the project was done, there was these butterflies flying around to each station. We thought it was her (Karina).”

The garden now provides a place to take a break and enjoy nature, Wiggins said.

“Sometimes the office can generate anxiety and a lot of stress for folks. This is a place where they can de-stress. They can just sit and watch the butterflies, and relax.

“It’s beautiful. I’m so happy they did this. They brought it back to life,” Wiggins said.

 

Garden Restoration and beautification
Girl Scout Troop 1263 Silver Award Project July 2017
Troop members: Kaitlin and Paige Traboulay, and Alyssa Duran

Made possible with the help of:

  • Andrew Abdul, donor
  • Suni Mohammed of Totally Blue H20
  • Chris Wirt of A All Animal Control of Tampa Bay
  • Lisa Tesla, artist
  • Families and close friends
  • T’Weiss as Nice

Published September 6, 2017

These kids want to help out

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None of these kids are old enough to go out and get a job.

They also have trouble finding places where they can volunteer.

So, they formed the “Helping Hands Club” to do something about that.

Twelve-year-old Caileigh Brown, a sixth-grader at Rushe Middle School, came up with the idea.

Members of the Helping Hands Club pose near the lake behind Heather Shisler’s home. Back row: Caileigh Brown, Kaylee Roy, Gavin Brown and Ella Neuffer. Front row: Isabella Steady and Alexis Hopper.
(B.C. Manion)

Other members of the club are 11-year-old Isabella Steady, a sixth-grader at Rushe; 11-year-old Alexis Hopper, a sixth-grader at Rushe; 13-year-old Kaylee Roy, an eighth-grader at Rushe; 10-year-old Ella Neuffer, a fifth-grader at Oakstead Elementary; and, 9-year-old Gavin Brown, Caileigh’s little brother, a fourth-grader at Oakstead.

The group formed shortly before the holidays.

The club meets on weekends at Heather Shisler’s home in Land O’ Lakes. Shisler is Gavin and Caileigh’s mom.

The meetings generally last about 90 minutes.

Early on, the kids focused on figuring out things they’d like to do.

So far, they helped at Sunrise of Pasco Inc., a domestic violence shelter, and at Zaksee’s Bird Sanctuary.

They sorted out a storage closet at the domestic violence shelter, and they helped do some cleaning and planted seeds at the bird sanctuary.

Club members said they’ve tried to get involved before, but have had trouble gaining momentum.

“In fourth and fifth grade, we would try to make these volunteer groups to help people. None of them were ever successful,” Steady said.

“A lot of the things that we actually wanted to do, we’re too young. You have to be 16,” Brown said.

Neuffer said she enjoys being in the club. “I love helping out people,” she said.

Brown’s little brother, Gavin, is first to admit he was drafted into the club. But, he said, he enjoys being part of it.

Shisler lets the club meet at her house, helps the kids with setting up volunteer opportunities and transporting them.

The group’s goal is to complete at least one — but hopefully more — volunteer activities each month.

The opportunities need to be within the general area, and need to be tasks that can be completed within a day or less.

The idea is to make a difference, the kids say.

“It’s a good thing to do in your free time, instead of watching TV,” Roy said.

The kids know there are a number of chores they can perform.

In some cases, they may be able to do chores for pay, such as babysitting or dog walking, in which case the money they earn would go for a charitable cause, they said.

Glenda Steady, who is Isabella’s mom, is grateful for Shisler’s willingness to open her home for club meetings, to help set volunteer appointments and to transport the kids.

She thinks the kids will benefit immensely. “They want to do something for others. I think it is awesome.”

Justin Hopper, who is Alexis’s dad, is also glad his daughter is involved.

He believes belonging to the club will help teach the kids about the satisfaction that comes from being of service to others. “It will serve them well the rest of their lives,” he said.

He also said their desire to help is sincere.

“There’s a lot of stuff they’re willing to do,” he said. “There’s really no lack of heart in this group.”

The kids hope their club will set a good example for other kids, and might inspire others to start their own clubs.

Anyone who is interested in getting involved, or who needs the Helping Hands Club’s help should contact Shisler at .

Published February 15, 2017

New commission on women forms in Pasco

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Two years ago Pasco County Chairwoman Kathryn Starkey and attorney Michele Hintson met by chance at a symposium on empowering women in politics and leadership.

They were the only two women at WeWill Tampa Bay from Pasco, but quickly bonded around a singular goal: To form a Commission on the Status of Women.

Hintson joined county staff members on Aug. 23 in presenting a plan to launch the commission.

The Pasco County Commission unanimously approved the concept.

“This is a historical day for women in Pasco County,” Starkey said.

The final vote and nominations to the 15-member commission are expected on Sept. 13.

Each county commissioner will appoint a member to the women’s commission.

Other community organizations, mostly nonprofits, will recommend nominees to fill out the remaining 10 slots. The county commission will make the final selections.

Participating organizations include Metropolitan Ministries, Sunrise of Pasco, Pasco-Hernando State College and Saint Leo University.

“The commission hopefully will be able to provide research and resources to develop opinions and make recommendations to (Pasco County) commissioners about certain needs in the community for women,” said Hintson, a Land O’ Lakes resident and an attorney with the Tampa-based law firm, Shumaker, Loop & Kendrick.

Issues might include equal pay, human trafficking, affordable housing, women’s health care and the needs of children.

Research by Pasco County’s legal staff revealed that the commission organizers aren’t reinventing the wheel.

An ordinance establishing a commission on women’s status won the approval of county commissioners on Oct. 16, 1979.

However, except for that one document, there is scant evidence of what happened afterward. It appears the commission was never fully activated, Hintson said.

Hintson said many women participated in two years of meetings to finalize plans to reactivate the Pasco women’s commission.

They included community activists, educators, county staff and business leaders, such as Rosie Paulson, Kelly Mothershead, Suzanne Legg, Elizabeth Blair, Krista Covey and Stephanie Pontlitz.

More than 200 commissions on the status of women are operating nationally. About 20 such commissions are in Florida, including one in Hillsborough County that began in the 1990s, and a Florida Commission on the Status of Women.

President John F. Kennedy formed the first women’s commission in 1961, with former First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt as chairwoman.

Published September 7, 2016

Junior Woman’s Club hosting unique bingo fundraiser

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Local woman’s club groups always have found interesting ways to raise money for projects in the past, but the GFWC Pasco Junior Woman’s Club may have discovered the most fascinating way yet.

The organization is readying for its summer fundraiser as part of “Drag Queen Bingo” night at Hamburger Mary’s in Ybor City on July 29. The restaurant chain is popular for its bingo games, designed to be humorous but effective in raising money, led by cross-dressing entertainers that attract a diverse group of players.

Check-in for bingo begins at 7 p.m., with the games kicking off at 7:30. Games are $10 for 10 games, with prizes provided by the club.

Proceeds benefit charities in the central Pasco County and Lutz communities, including Sunrise of Pasco, a local domestic violence shelter.

Hamburger Mary’s is located at 1600 E. Seventh Ave., in Ybor City, on the second floor of Centro Ybor. It offers a full restaurant menu and bar, but does have limited seating on bingo nights. Because of that, the Junior Woman’s Club is recommending reservations, which can be made by calling (813) 241-6279.

Showering others with kindness

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Every year, like clockwork, members of the Lutz-Land O’ Lakes Woman’s Club throw a luncheon and shower to benefit women and children living in two area domestic violence shelters.

Club members come to the event bearing clothing and other gifts to give to the shelter residents. They tend to be practical items, such as diapers, children’s toys, children’s clothing and personal hygiene supplies.

The woman’s group also has a boutique and a flea market, where club members and the general public can shop to raise money for the shelters.

Rosie Heim, president of the Lutz-Land O’ Lakes Woman’s Club, works with member Jeannie to sort donations. (Photo courtesy of the Lutz-Land O’ Lakes Woman’s Club)
Rosie Heim, president of the Lutz-Land O’ Lakes Woman’s Club, works with member Jeannie to sort donations. (Photo courtesy of the Lutz-Land O’ Lakes Woman’s Club)

The event also features a $6-a-plate lunch of lasagna, salad, bread, a drink and dessert, which is open to the public.

“Last year, we fed 75 people,” said Joan Collins, chairwoman of the luncheon for the woman’s club.

The items provided through the woman’s club luncheon lifts the spirits of the women and children who live at Sunrise of Pasco Inc.’s domestic violence shelter, said Trish Kley, the center’s development director.

They appreciate that people who don’t even know them are willing to help them, and they marvel at the items that are donated, she said.

Shelter residents get excited as “they are unloading and unloading and unloading” the vehicles that deliver the items that were donated at the shower, Kley said.

“What they do is fantastic. So many of these things, we’d never be able to supply,” Kley added.

The shelter is grateful for any donations and particularly need practical items, such as toilet paper, toiletries and bigger-ticket items such as highchairs, car seats and strollers.

Sunrise is seeing a growing demand, and is addressing that by adding 15 new beds, Kley said.

The woman’s club event offers a chance to do a bit of shopping and to mingle at lunch, Collins said. Before lunch, there’s a boutique and mini-flea market, where club members and the general public can purchase goods.

The money raised is donated to Sunrise and to the Pasco County Salvation Army Domestic Violence Shelter in Pasco County.

Collins said once the boutique is over, the club will also donate those gently used items — if the shelters want them.

The woman’s club gets satisfaction from the annual event because they know that the shelters need the help, Collins said.

“They’re very appreciative of everything we give them,” Collins said.

Abuse shelter benefit luncheon and boutique

Aug. 22: 10 a.m. shopping at the boutique, followed by lunch at 11:30 a.m.
Lunch is $6 a plate for lasagna, salad, bread, dessert and a drink
Where: Lutz Community Center, 98 First Ave. N.W.
Questions? Call Joan Collins at (813) 855-7254.