After years of struggling to find her own self-worth, Ashley Wichlenski made it her mission to help teenage girls fighting similar battles.
So, she decided to write a book to do just that.
‘The Keeper of My Heart” is Wichlenski’s Christian-based, interactive self-help book that strives to build confidence in girls and help them become comfortable in their own skin.
Passages focus on forgiveness, strength and self-love, among other positive reinforcing messages.
They’re written as letters to girls “from the heart of Jesus and he how sees you,” Wichlenski said.
She explained it like this: “The main goal of this book was to show (girls) that their identity is in Christ. It’s not based off how the world sees you or how you even see yourself, it’s based off how your creator made you.”
Geared toward females, ages 12 to 20, the 60-page book also features coloring pages and space for writing journal entries. In essence, it’s an adult coloring book, she said.
Balancing a full-time job and her responsibilities as a mother and wife, it took Wichlenski about a year to complete.
Wichlenski, 34, works throughout Lutz and Pasco County as a sales account manager for United Materials Inc., a Tampa-based wholesaler of countertop products. She lives in Apollo Beach.
The author, who grew up in Tampa, acknowledged experiencing “a dark time” in her own life during her 20s.
During that period, she believed her worth needed to be based off looks, income and other superficial factors.
“I was homecoming queen in high school, so a girl can kind of grow up thinking, ‘My worth is based off of all these things that the world points to,’” Wichlenski said.
Her outlook changed in recent years, however.
The guidance of her faith, she said, helped her realize “your worth is based on your soul.”
Since publishing the book, Wichlenski has regularly begun speaking at various churches throughout the Tampa Bay area.
She often tells teenage girls to be authentic and not force themselves to conform to societal norms and influences from pop culture and social media.
The author explained: “It’s OK to be totally different and it’s OK to love the way that you were created to look. Sometimes it’s a purposeful thing: You have to look yourself in the mirror and say, ‘I am beautiful and I am loved and I am strong,’ and you have to say those things to yourself to kind of build that confidence.’”
It’s important for young women to know that they “are worthy of the best, and they don’t have to compare and look to the world’s approval of them,” she added
In the advent of social media and cyber bullying, Wichlenski believes teenage girls have a rougher go nowadays, compared to when she was growing up.
“There’s so much pressure for a girl to be perfect,” she said, noting teenagers today are so frequently judged on their attractiveness, popularity and so on.
“Social media has taken a toll on a lot of girls these days,” she said. “It can be very difficult to know exactly who you are and how amazing you are.”
Wichlenski encourages parents of teenage girls to make themselves “very available” to listen to their problems and to offer positive guidance.
“Parents need to talk with them about issues that may even make them feel uncomfortable. You have to bring it up. You have to talk to them,” Wichlenski said.
Wichlenski plans to pen other editions of ‘The Keeper of My Heart’ that would be geared to younger girls and working women. She is also planning a book for boys, and she plans to have the current edition translated into Spanish.
For more information, visit TheKeeperOfMyHeart.com.
Published September 19, 2018
