B.C. Manion

Many firsts this year as Pigz in Z’Hills gets reboot

January 8, 2014 By B.C. Manion

Pigz in Z’Hills BBQ & Blues Fest got rolling in 2010, spurred by a suggestion from Darrell and Pat Pennington, at the time members of the Greater Zephyrhills Chamber of Commerce board of directors.

A variety of activities will be available for young and old at the Fourth Annual Pigz in Z’Hills BBQ and Blues Fest. Shown here, a woman takes part in a corn toss game.

The chamber was looking for a fundraiser because it needed a way to support scholarships, chamber programs and local causes, Pat Pennington recalled. The couple had gone to a barbecue in Lakeland, and while they were there, it occurred to them that it was something the chamber could do in Zephyrhills.

So, the couple suggested the idea at the next board meeting and the board embraced it. The event has continued to evolve ever since.

The first year, it drew 13 barbecue teams. This year, event organizers hope there will be 35 to 40 teams. Those teams will chase after $8,000 in prize money, trophies, bragging rights and the chance to compete at higher-level barbecue competitions.

This year’s event also will introduce a number of new elements, said Vonnie Mikkelsen, executive director of the Zephyrhills chamber. For one thing, the venue has changed. The new home for the event is Zephyrhills Municipal Airport, 39450 South Ave., in Zephyrhills.

By hosting the event, the city will have a chance to showcase its airport, airport manager Michael Handrahan said.

Besides being able to buy tasty barbecue and listen to bands, patrons will have a chance to check out interesting aircraft, listen to a talk by a teenage glider pilot, and tour the Zephyrhills Museum of Military History, Handrahan said.

Patrons won’t have access to the airfield itself and there won’t be any flying events, the airport manager said. But there’s a chance some pilots will fly in for the day. That’s because the airport is encouraging pilots to fly in to enjoy some barbecue and music.

Since its inception, Pigz in Z’Hills BBQ & Blues, has been a fundraiser, providing thousands of dollars for local youth and education programs, including the YMCA of East Pasco, Zephyrhills Fire Rescue Explorers, Zephyrhills Police Athletic League, the Pasco County Sheriff’s Charities, the Zephyrhills Army JROTC, Zephyrhills High School athletics and clubs, and the chamber scholarship fund.

The event is designed to be a fun day for families, while providing a legitimate contest for barbecue aficionados.

The annual contest has been sanctioned by the Florida Barbecue Association since 2011, and has been designated as a state championship contest since 2012. The grand champion of the professional division qualifies to compete at the American Royal Nationals in Kansas City, Mo., and gets in the draw from the state for the Jack Daniel’s World Championship in Lynchburg, Tenn. The contest is open to professional and backyard teams. Entry fees are $300 for the pros and $200 for the backyard teams.

Besides lip-smacking barbecue, the festival offers music from four live blues bands, a classic car and motorcycle show and a kids’ fun zone, featuring bounce houses and field games, as well as arts and crafts.

Another change this year is the admission charge.

In previous years, event-goers paid $5 to get in, with free admission for children under 12. This year, there is no charge to get in, but parking is $10.

Also different from before is the timing. In the past, the barbecue contest was in October. Now it’s in January, and changing the date has many benefits, Mikkelsen said.

For one thing, it allows the community to welcome a group of residents who were unable to attend the event in previous years, she said.

“We found that a lot of our seasonal residents who come down in November and December were always disappointed to find out that they had missed it,” Mikkelsen said.

Pennington thinks the snowbirds will enjoy being able to eat some barbecue and take their time on the airport grounds, strolling around to take a look at the aircraft and to visit the museum.

The barbecue meals are affordable, too, Pennington said, selling for as little $7 and sandwiches for around $3.

Organizers had another good reason for changing the date of the event, Mikkelsen said. In October, many events are competing for people’s time, attention and resources. While that may be fun for residents, it’s challenging for an event organizer who is trying to raise money because they are competing for sponsors, volunteers and patrons.

While the festival is just a one-day event, planning begins a full year ahead of time, Mikkelsen said. About six months before the event, the committee volunteers start organizing and accepting areas of responsibility.

“You’re looking for sponsors,” Mikkelsen said. “You’re looking for in-kind donations. You’re starting to put together your marketing campaign. You’re starting to do the initial budget projection and fitting all of the pieces together.”

That’s also when the blues bands are selected.

“Then you start rolling into the crunch time, which is 90 days out. You better have your permits done,” Mikkelsen said, noting health, alcohol and tent permits must be secured.

Organizers also need to get insurance for the event, do a site plan and be sure to address such things as water, electrical, trash, security, portable restrooms, stages, parking and other issues that must be addressed to carry off a successful event.

Much of the success of the event hinges on the help that the chamber gets from community partners, Mikkelsen said. Some sponsors have been there from the beginning, like CenterState Bank.

“We sell Pig Bucks. That’s the event currency,” Mikkelsen said. “We have to print up so many Pig Bucks and have them counted, bundled and prepared — just like a bank — for the vendors.”

The Pasco County Sheriff’s Posse also has been there since the beginning, Pennington said, managing the event parking.

Anyone wishing additional information about this year’s event is welcome to call (813) 782-1913, email , or visit ZephyrhillsChamber.org.

Revival of Christmas Card Lane draws a big crowd

December 25, 2013 By B.C. Manion

Children played drums, rang hand bells, sang, clapped rhythmically and even did a little dancing to entertain the crowd that gathered for the Christmas Card Lane celebration in downtown Lutz.

If there’s a community event in Lutz, you can bet that the GFWC Lutz-Land O’ Lakes Woman’s Club will have a hand in it. This group raises money with various events, and uses the funds to support numerous community causes. (Photo by B.C. Manion)

Hundreds gathered for the event, which also featured a visit from Santa, a few remarks by the community’s honorary Lutz Guv’na, and the ceremonial flipping of the switch to illuminate 16 giant holiday cards.

The 8-by-4-foot cards are posted along the edge of Memorial Park, across the street from the Lutz Depot Building, where the crowd watched the children from Lutz Elementary School perform.

The event marked the revival of the old Christmas Card Lane tradition in Lutz. The tradition ceased some years back, but a special edition of the event was done this year to mark the community’s 100th birthday.

The Christmas Card Lane celebration was the fourth and final event to mark the community’s centennial.

Ligia Grams was there to watch her son Dakota, 8, perform.

She gave the event high marks.

“It’s a good community outing for everyone,” Grams said. “It just brings everyone together. The kids will have a blast.”

Diane DeMarco and her husband, Dan, also came out to watch the Lutz Elementary children perform, which included their son, Joseph, 8. DeMarco also thought the event would be a good way to get into the Christmas spirit.

Her family moved to Lutz three years ago because of the community’s reputation for having a small-town feel.

Indeed, as chronicled in local history books written by Eliabeth Riegler MacManus and her daughter, Susan A. MacManus, community gatherings have long been the social glue for Lutz.

So, when the Lutz Centennial Committee was planning how to celebrate the community’s 100th birthday, they reasoned that community gatherings would be the way to go.

The first centennial event was a food truck rally in March. Next came the community’s massive Fourth of July Celebration, with its many traditions. Like always, it drew thousands of spectators.

After that, the committee had a chili cook-off and classic car show.

Suzin Carr, honorary Lutz Guv’na, was delighted by the turnout at the Christmas Card Lane event. Indeed, all of the celebrations have been well received by community residents and businesses, she said.

“We had fun during all of them,” said Bob Moore, chairman of the Lutz Centennial Committee.

The chili cook-off and classic car show had to contend with morning downpours, causing Moore to nickname it “Rain Fest.” But even that turned out to be a good event, he said.

“We’re from Lutz, we can party in the rain,” he quipped. “We can party under any conditions.”

The collection of giant cards on Christmas Card Lane reflects the community’s stalwart organizations and some local businesses. The GFWC Lutz-Land O’ Lakes Woman’s Club’s card, for example, depicts Santa riding in a train — a tribute to the community’s deep history involving the movement of goods through it by rail cars.

Troop 12 of the Boy Scouts, and Pack 12 of the Cub Scouts also created cards. There’s also a card from the Civil Air Patrol – North Tampa-Lutz Cadet Squadron.

The Citizens for the Old Lutz School also posted a card, as did Lutz Elementary, Maniscalco Elementary and Learning Gate Community schools.

The cards show varied artistic styles and holiday themes.

One sign that seems perfect for a Florida Christmas depicts a pink flamingo wearing a Santa’s hat, while hanging out under a palm tree at the beach.

There’s a bucket on the sand nearby, chock full of paintbrushes. That card, fittingly enough, was sponsored by The Florida Suncoast Decorative Artists.

Some angels, like this volunteer, don’t have wings

December 25, 2013 By B.C. Manion

When 77-year-old Jeanette Tatro heard her name being called as the Volunteer of the Year for Gulfside Regional Hospice, the Zephyrhills woman couldn’t believe her ears.

Jeanette Tatro, Gulfside Regional Hospice’s Volunteer of the Year, has a long record of serving others through the organization. (Photo by B.C. Manion)

After all, she had received the award two other times in the past, and she also is the sole winner of the organization’s Spirit of Hospice Award.

It didn’t surprise her when her name was announced as one of the organization’s volunteers who had clocked more than 500 hours of service that year. But when the presenter began describing the winner of the volunteer of the year, the petite, silver-haired woman, Tatro thought the speaker was talking about someone else.

“When I heard my name announced, I was actually dumbfounded,” Tatro said. “It was unbelievable. I couldn’t move. I was shocked.”

In just a year, Tatro racked up 541 volunteer hours. She cashiered at the organization’s Zephyrhills Thrift Shoppe. She visited hospice patients. She called families through Gulfside’s bereavement program.

She helped promote the organization by working at information booths at fairs and festivals throughout Pasco County.

Kelly Milner, director of volunteer services, characterized the volunteer as “a very loving and compassionate person” who is always willing to pitch in, wherever needed.

Tatro said she became a hospice volunteer 11 years ago, a year after her husband, Edmund, died from lung cancer.

“He was actually under hospice care for one week,” Tatro said.

Her husband wanted to die at home, but he was a large man and Tatro lacked the strength to manage his care on her own. Tatro also was caring for her ill sister at the same time.

So, her husband went to Hospice House for his final days. After he died and Tatro’s sister died, the Zephyrhills woman stepped up to volunteer.

“I felt that no one should die alone,” she said. “I felt that I could help the family out in that transition, due to the fact that I had gone through it.”

Tatro said another personal loss she experienced also prepared her to help others work through their grief.

“I lost a child, and I think that’s another reason that I can relate,” Tatro said. “It was a miscarriage at five-and-a-half months,” she said. “That’s been over 55 years” ago, she said. To this day, she feels sad on the anniversary of that baby’s death.

Besides having the desire to support others through their grief and loss, Tatro has another motivation for volunteering: “It’s a give back,” she said. “I think I’ve been very blessed by the Lord and I feel I should give back. I can reach out in so many different ways. Not everybody can.”

Beyond helping others, volunteering brings her great joy.

“It’s very rewarding,” Tatro said. “You meet so many different people. There are so many stories that they have.”

Besides suffering through personal losses, Tatro has spent time with many others who have experienced a death in the family. She has been with patients as they took their final breath, and has been with families as they experienced the loss.

“Grief is different for each person,” Tatro said. Hospice is there to help — not only during the time of a loved one’s death, but also through ongoing bereavement support.

She encourages anyone who wants to be of service to consider becoming a hospice volunteer.

“We can do so much for the families,” Tatro said. “We can give them time, either to go to the store or, they might want to go out on an outing for a couple of hours. We can give them a break. They need a break.”

Not everyone is able to sit with someone who is facing the final stage of life, Tatro said. But there are plenty of other ways to help. They can volunteer at the thrift store, or help in the kitchen, or deliver meals, or work at information booths at festival and fairs.

Donating items to the thrift shop is another way to help, Tatro said. If someone has an interest in volunteering, she encourages them to give it a try.

“It is a great experience and the only way they’re going to find out is to experience it for themselves,” Tatro said.

Sanders Memorial Elementary to reopen as magnet school

December 25, 2013 By B.C. Manion

It may be a while, but when Sanders Memorial Elementary School reopens in Land O’ Lakes, it will become Pasco County Schools’ first magnet school.

Sanders will emphasize science, technology, engineering, art and mathematics, said Dave Scanga, executive director of the Central Region of Pasco County Schools.

This is a preliminary rendering for what Sanders Memorial Elementary School will look like when it is redeveloped. The appearance could change slightly because the final plans are not yet done. (Image courtesy of Pasco County Schools)

The school district funded the redesign of Sanders in 2008, but the project was put on hold because the housing market crashed. Now the district is looking to open Sanders in the 2015-16 school year. But first construction plans for the school must be updated to comply with changes in the Florida building code as well as educational needs of the magnet program.

The enrollment would be drawn largely from the Land O’ Lakes area to relieve overcrowding at Connerton Elementary School, Scanga said. Remaining seats would be open for students living outside the school’s normal boundaries.

When completed, Sanders — located at 5126 School Road — will be almost entirely new. Just three of the former school’s buildings remain on site. The rest were demolished.

Besides being the district’s first magnet, Sanders also will benefit from an agreement between the school board and Pasco County. The arrangement aims at providing more recreational opportunities for school children and the community at large, while also broadening learning opportunities and providing a venue to accommodate community gatherings.

The county expects to make about $1.5 million in improvements in 2014 at the Land O’ Lakes Community Park, located at 5401 U.S. 41.

The school board set the redesign of Sanders into motion on Dec. 3 by approving the expenditure of $684,350 for architectural services from Williamson Dacar Architects for the design, permitting and contract administration services. The district also has put out a request for qualifications for the Sanders project.

In keeping with the school’s educational mission, the updated plans will include some special design features.

For instance, the classrooms will have wireless technology, and space will be planned to give students room to collaborate. There also will be storage space for student projects and sinks in classrooms, to accommodate experiments.

Plans also will include several site design elements, which may not be built right away, but added later. Those include:
• An environmental center and boardwalk through the wetlands. Designs for the environmental center will include a covered work area with power, water and wireless connections.
• Photovoltaic demonstration panels to be used as a teaching tool for students.
• A solar hot water heater system to be used as a teaching tool for students.
• Provisions for a wind turbine.
• Areas for student gardens around the classroom buildings.

Alison Crumbley, chairwoman for the Pasco County School Board, said she supports giving parents another school choice. At the same time, she wants to see more educational opportunities in these academic areas for children in schools throughout the district.

There are hundreds of thousands of jobs that are not being filled in the country because of a shortage of skilled workers, Crumbley said. She wants district schools to do more to help its students acquire skills they will need to pursue those kinds of careers.

Old Lutz School turns into Christmas House for holidays

December 25, 2013 By B.C. Manion

Jason and Jessica Smith have a holiday tradition with their three young children.

The Land O’ Lakes couple brings the youngsters to the Christmas House at Old Lutz School where the kids get a giant serving of holiday cheer. As they make their way through the historic building, Maddy, 6; Amelia, 5; and Elliot, 2, have plenty to see.

Do you love nutcrackers? Then you’ll enjoy the giant collection on display at the Christmas House at Old Lutz School. (Photo by B.C. Manion)

One room in the school at 18819 N. U.S. 41 is filled with Christmas trees, decked out in all sorts of themes. One of those trees is decked out with paper ornaments colored by kindergarten children at Lutz Elementary School.

In another room, visitors can check out a huge assortment of nutcrackers. There are also rooms with miniature trains that make their way through towns and villages.

Outside there are other decorations.

Lights spell out “Season’s Greetings” in front of the historic building, and windows are illuminated by lighted decorations. There’s an old-fashioned Nativity scene on the south side of the school, and lighted sculptural figures include deer and an angel.

After enjoying the decorations, visitors are invited to have a cup of hot chocolate and a cookie or two

“For kids their age, this is great,” said Jessica Smith, noting her kids just love it. “We usually come on multiple nights.”

Admission is free, but donations are accepted to help pay for the upkeep of the building, which opened in the 1926-27 school year. The building, which has a Georgian architectural style, is listed on the National Register of Historic Places.

The schoolhouse is an icon in this community, which has a long history of protecting its quality of life. At one point, there were plans to knock down the building as part of a plan to widen U.S. 41.

Those plans were tossed out, however, after the community galvanized to save the old school, which has a special place in the collective memories of generations to Lutz residents.

The Citizens for the Old Lutz School puts on the annual Christmas display as a way to share the building with the community and raise funds to support its upkeep. Group member Marilyn Wannamaker has volunteered at the Christmas House for years. She was there last week, serving up hot chocolate and cookies.

People of all ages enjoy the annual tradition, Wannamaker said.

“There’s mothers, dads, grandparents and children — most of them come back year after year,” she said.

“You see families return every year,” said Helen Cantrell, another volunteer.

For many, it’s a chance to run into old friends — something quite easy to do in Lutz — where many residents have lived for generations.

Maxine Conway, of Land O’ Lakes, came out to Christmas House to help Wannamaker pass out goodies.

“I appreciate the work that goes into it,” Conway said.

Christmas House organizers realize that people are often frazzled before Christmas, so they keep the house open for a couple of days after Dec. 25. Besides accommodating busy parents, it also gives out-of-town visitors a chance to savor the season.

Annie Fernandez, whose family has deep roots in Lutz, enjoys volunteering at Christmas House. She gets a kick out of watching the children’s reactions as they go through the decorated rooms. The youngsters tend to gravitate to a collection of elves, Fernandez said.

At first, Fernandez didn’t understand the children’s fascination. But now, she knows.

It turns out that they know all about the “Elf on A Shelf” — a special scout sent from the North Pole to help Santa manage his nice and naughty lists, said Fernandez, who reminds the children that these elves also are Santa’s Helpers.

WHAT: Christmas House at the Old Lutz School, featuring decorated trees, miniature trains, angels, Santas, nutcrackers and other holiday décor
WHERE: Old Lutz School, 18819 N. U.S. 41.
WHEN: Dec. 26 and Dec. 27, 6:30 p.m. to 9 p.m.
COST: Admission is free. Donations are accepted to support the upkeep of the Old Lutz School, a building on the National Register of Historic Places.

Son’s death becomes catalyst for couple’s life work

December 18, 2013 By B.C. Manion

Deb Gilbert never pictured herself as a missionary in Africa, but she also never imagined the immense pain she would experience when her son Sean died at 18.

“Your perspective on life changes a whole lot when something like that happens,” she said.

The young man’s death was the catalyst for Deb Gilbert and her husband, Mike, to close the family business, sell their Lutz home, liquidate their belongings and move to Africa to establish One City Ministries.

Before her son died, he was entrenched in a cycle of addiction, Deb Gilbert said. He would attempt to step away from his self-destructive lifestyle, but would be easily drawn back into it by his friends. Once the Gilberts knew their son had a serious problem, they tried to get him help. But Sean wasn’t ready to make a change.

He finally had some close calls that even scared him and had reached a point when he realized he had to change, Deb Gilbert said. Sean talked to his parents about it on a Friday evening.

“He knew he had to stop seeing certain people. Everything seemed to be going in the right direction,” she said. “On that Sunday evening, he was with some friends. And he said, ‘This is the last time I’m going to party with you like this.’ And, in fact, it was.”

The Gilberts’ son’s partying that night led to his death, and about six months after her son died, Deb Gilbert said she was in his room and having a conversation with God.

She said she was looking at Sean’s ashes and telling God: “This is all I have left of my son.”

In response, she said she heard God say: “Everything here is ashes, that’s not the important thing.”

Next, God told her to go to Africa, she said.

“I walked out of Sean’s room and said to Mike, ‘We’re moving to Africa.’”

At the time, Deb Gilbert said she knew almost nothing about the continent.

The death of their son was a pivotal moment, causing the couple to reevaluate their lives, Mike Gilbert said. They felt compelled to answer God’s call: “God gave us distinctive marching orders.”

Before moving to Uganda, however, they did some research on Africa and they visited another ministry that had operations there. Although that ministry didn’t feel like the right fit for them, Uganda did, Mike Gilbert said.

So, they started One City Ministries, and moved to Africa.

That was six years ago.

The ministry they’ve established uses a holistic approach.

“We deal with the economic issues, we deal with the health issues, we deal with the spiritual issues,” Mike Gilbert said. “You can’t go in and pick one weed and feel like you’ve weeded the garden. I liken it to building a house. You have to first build the foundation. The foundation to me is opportunity, which brings empowerment, which will help whittle away at injustices.”

When they arrived at the village, they did not give any handouts, Deb Gilbert said.

“We didn’t have enough to hand out,” she said.

A woman came to them with baskets she had made, and Deb Gilbert bought them.

“Her reaction, I think just stuck with us forever,” Deb Gilbert said. “She went to her knees and thanked us. She was able to buy for her family to eat that night.”

The word started to get out that Mike and Deb were buying, and people would bring them things they were making. Some were beautiful, others not so much.

The idea, initially, was to bring the artworks to America to sell them and to help raise awareness of the little opportunity these villagers had.

“Our first year, we wanted to bring the stories back. We ended up having 16 giant boxes of things people had made. And, all had a story,” Deb Gilbert said.

They brought those items to Grace Family Church in Lutz, where she previously worked, and set up an African marketplace in the sanctuary.

Over time, the program has evolved. Artists produce crafts, which the ministry buys and then ships to America to sell. The money raised from the program covers the ministry’s administrative costs, and is reinvested to provide new services. It’s also reinvested back into the village’s economy, which is how economy gets created, Mike Gilbert said.

This year, the program shipped two tons of goods to be sold, he added.

The Africa TrAID Marketplace last November at the Museum of Science & Industry featured thousands of unique items made by more than 200 artists. They included woodcarvings, recycled metal sculptures, hand-painted cards and colorful textiles.

Besides helping the artisans, the ministry is also teaching farmers more effective methods for growing coffee. The ministry wants to create a co-op to help farmers get a better return on their crops by streamlining the processing, shipping and selling of the coffee.

Besides helping people become economically self-sufficient, the ministry aims to set a good example by refusing to pay bribes to local officials — a very common practice in Africa, Mike Gilbert said.

It also is working to create Light Village, an economically self-sustaining community that can serve as a model for others.

Although they live in Uganda, the couple comes back for about a month each year, staying with local families to defray their expenses. When they come back, they sell goods and share stories about the work of One City Ministries, which help generate support to expand its programs.

“What drives me there is just the injustices they have to endure,” Deb Gilbert said. She and her husband want to help the villagers have greater opportunities, so they can build better lives for themselves.

For more information about One City Ministries, visit OneCityMinistries.org.

Dealing with grief and stress at the holidays

December 18, 2013 By B.C. Manion

Heirloom ornaments, twinkling lights and festive wrapping paper can help set the scene for a magical holiday season. But the idealized notions that people carry around in their heads about the holidays rarely happen.

Indeed, no one really experiences the perfect holidays, and the season can be painful or difficult for those grieving the loss of a loved one or experiencing some kind of stress.

“I think a lot of people think, ‘Everybody, but our family, is having the Waltons’ Christmas, or the Norman Rockwell Christmas, or the Currier and Ives Christmas,” said Grace Terry, founder of Grief Resolution Resources of Tampa. “Here’s the truth: Nobody has the Waltons’ Christmas, except the Waltons.”

The holidays can be challenging for everyone, Terry said. At best, they may have peaceful and joyful moments, or perhaps, even hours.

“Rarely is there a joyful, peaceful full day, I’m afraid,” she said. “Everybody has some stress. Everybody has some memories of past holidays – again, hopefully everybody has some positive memories, but you know, everybody also has some bittersweet memories, and some memories that are not so happy and joyful.”

Any time there is a death of a loved one, whether it is a family member or dear friend, the first year after the death can be very challenging, Terry said. As the holidays approach, if the family plans to celebrate together, it’s good to have the conversation in advance of the family gathering. That way, “people aren’t taken by surprise and wondering, ‘Oh, what should I do?’

“People will be less awkward or nervous, if we can mention ahead of time, ‘I may want to talk about missing mom,’ or ‘I may want to talk about mom’s famous Christmas cookies, or dad’s snoring when he falls asleep’” after the holiday meal, she said.

Talking it out ahead of time can help reduce feelings of embarrassment or shame about how to handle the absence of the loved one at the holidays, Terry said. She encourages people to have the conversation, and that it’s OK to mention the person’s name who died, it’s OK if a few tears are shed, and everyone remembers a loved one who is not with them this year.

“Nobody has to be embarrassed or ashamed if we tell our favorite story of the deceased loved one, or we mention ‘We surely do miss him,’” Terry said. “If somebody becomes tearful, that’s one way of honoring the deceased.”

By talking in advance of holiday gatherings, family members may find out that they want to take a different approach this year, Terry said.

“A lot of people make assumptions about what everybody else wants without even asking,” she said. “The majority of the people in (the) family might be really wishing that we could really downsize it this year, but everybody’s thinking we’ve got to do what we’ve always done.”

The grief counselor also encourages people to honor their own feelings about how they want to celebrate — or not celebrate — the holidays. Sometimes people think they have to continue the traditions they’ve always had, even if they’re not up to it, Terry said.

It’s also important for people to remember that they are not obliged to do something they don’t want to do, just to live up to others’ expectations.

“They can take the year off, or they can scale back and streamline to a bare minimum,” she said. “The world will keep right on turning. If it just feels like a huge burden and a chore, don’t do it. Even if you’ve done it the same way all of your life, it’s OK to do it differently this year if you want to do it differently.”

Traditions are wonderful, Terry said, but “sometimes they just need to grow and evolve, and deal with present reality.”

It’s also important to remember that what works for one person may not work for another.

“People do grieve differently,” Terry said.

Friends of the bereaved might also be at a loss as to how to help. Terry says to tell them they know that for a lot of people, the first holiday season after the death of a loved one can be painful and difficult.

“How are you feeling about the winter holidays that are coming up?” Terry suggests. “What do you think would be best for you, and how can I support that?

“Then, shut up and listen.”

For those who are struggling with grief, Terry advises that they reach out for support, and never feel embarrassed by it.

“Everybody needs support all of the time,” she said. “When we’re grieving, we need extra.”

Terry organizes sessions called Grief Café where people who are struggling with grief can share in an informal setting. When people don’t work through their grief, it can manifest itself in substance abuse, broken relationships and spiritual despair, Terry said.

She also had another bit of advice for those who want to help the bereaved during the holidays: “Practice kindness and tolerance in the spirit of the season.”

Grief Cafe
Grief Café is a relaxed small group conversation about loss and grief facilitated by a professional that meets the third Thursday of the month from 2:30 p.m. to 4 p.m., in the board room of at Cooper Financial Services, 5420 Land O’ Lakes Blvd., in Land O’ Lakes.
Upcoming sessions are set for Dec. 19 and Jan. 16.
The groups generally are kept to 10 people or fewer. There is no charge, but donations are accepted. If you’d like to attend, please reserve a spot by 5 p.m., the day before the session, by calling (727) 487-3207.

Misconceptions about Grief
These statements are false, but generally believed to be true:
• The best way to manage grief is to stay busy.
• Tears are a sign of weakness and loss of control.
• Expressing grief shows a lack of faith.
• Time heals all wounds.
• The goal of bereavement care is to help people get over grief as quickly as possible.
• No one can really help a grieving person resolve his or her grief.
• Only people with advanced specialized formal professional education and a professional license can help someone with his or her grief.
• If we see someone who has recently experienced a traumatic loss, it is best not to mention the loss because we might upset them.
• Children do not grieve because they don’t understand what’s happening.
– Source: Grace Terry of Grief Resolution Resources of Tampa

New pet pantry to help feed Fido and Sylvester, too

December 18, 2013 By B.C. Manion

When families struggling to make ends meet, they aren’t the only ones who suffer. Sometimes the dog bowl and cat dish go empty, too.

A new effort is under way in Dade City to collect donations of pet food that can be distributed to families in need. Those wishing to contribute dog food, cat food, pet toys, leashes, collars and other pet items can bring them to Dog-Mania & Cats Pet Boutique and Pet Lovers Gift Shop, 14012 Seventh St., Suite A, in Dade City.

The sponsors of Dogs Day in Dade City decided to set up the Dogs Day Pet Pantry because they want to help people keep their pets.

Donations can be dropped off Tuesday through Saturday, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., said shop owner Suzanne Gagliolo.

After pet food and other pet items are collected, they will be distributed through a network established by Love One Another, a program that helps people in need, Gagliolo said.

“Because of the economic conditions we’re in, people have had to give up their pets,” Gagliolo said.

Pet owners typically want to keep their animals. They typically don’t give them up, unless they simply can’t afford to keep them, she said.

“For many people, these (pets) are their children,” Gagliolo said.

When pets are taken to shelters, they often end up being euthanized.

The Dogs Day Pet Pantry aims to help pet owners keep their pets and prevent animals from being destroyed.

“We can get them in touch with someone who can help them,” Gagliolo said.

The shop can be reached at (352) 457-9616. To find out more about Dogs Day in Dade City, go to DogsDayInDadeCity.com.

David Heller: ‘He was a big kid at heart’

December 11, 2013 By B.C. Manion

David Heller wasn’t the kind of guy who had to impress others by symbols of success, say those who knew him well. He was much more interested in how he treated others.

Heller died Oct. 29 from an enlarged heart. A celebration of his life is planned for Dec. 14 at 10 a.m., at Reilly’s Reserve in Tampa’s Lowry Park Zoo, 1101 W. Sligh Ave., in Tampa.

The 48-year-old was a science teacher at a number of schools including Orange Grove Elementary School, Mary Help of Christians School, Pepin Academy and Randall Middle School. Although he taught science, his brother Mark Heller said he was really a “teacher of life.”

“I think he found the most meaning in his summer work,” said Mark Heller, head of school at Academy at the Lakes in Land O’ Lakes. “He was one of those teachers who never took a summer vacation. He always worked, and he worked at camps his entire adult life as a camp counselor.”

For many years, David Heller worked as the lead counselor at Camp Hiawatha in Odessa, and after that closed, he came to work at Summer at the Lakes, the summer day camp offered by Academy at the Lakes.

“David always taught life lessons through fun activities,” his brother said. “Usually, they were lessons about character, lessons about respect — from things as simple as taking turns, to rolling with the punches — understanding that certain things are more important than other things.”

Barbara Soule, director of Summer at the Lakes, said she was shocked when she heard the news of David’s death.

“He’s going to be greatly missed,” Soule said. He had a knack for connecting with others, especially kids. And they flocked to his camps.

“The kids were not just taking a camp, they were taking the camp because of him,” said Soule, noting he took great care to keep kids not only safe, but made sure they were having a great time, too. “To me, he was the epitome of a great camp counselor. I think he was a big kid at heart. He told jokes all of the time, and he loved to tell stories.”

David Heller taught archery, canoeing and fishing programs.

“It was very important to him that the kids catch a fish,” Soule said, and if a camper was having trouble, he would bring in a trinket and tell the camper it was a good luck charm.

Soule said she doesn’t know how or why it worked, but somehow it did.

“By golly, they’d always catch a fish. The kids were so excited,” Soule said.

Penny Benson, who works in the business office at Academy at the Lakes, said David Heller taught her daughter Brandy how to fish. The family still has a picture of Brandy with the bass she caught using a cane pole and a hot dog, Benson said.

When Benson told her daughter about the camp counselor’s death, the teenager immediately began telling her mom about the inside jokes she shared with the outdoors enthusiast.

“She loved Mr. David,” Benson said. “I felt like it hit my family, too.”

Heller said there was no indication that his brother was ill.

“He came home and laid down to take a nap and never woke up,” he said. “Though I’m deeply sad, I feel really proud that this really good man was my brother, and he is remembered so fondly by all because he was just plain good.”

Mikey Mauger, a junior at Sunlake High School, sent Mark Heller a sympathy note after David Heller’s death.

“I fortunately had the privilege of working with him at camp this summer for three weeks,” Mauger wrote. “One thing I will never forget is that he taught me that loving relationships with good people are more rewarding than any material possession or individual achievement.”

Those were exactly the kinds of lessons that mattered to his brother, Heller said.

Besides Mark, David Heller is survived by his mother and father, Jack and Judy Heller; his sister, Lynn Heller; his sister-in-law, Kathy; his nieces, Eden Heller and Kennedy Lachicotte; his nephew, Ben Lachicotte, and his girlfriend, Lori Capra, of Olympia, Wash.

Those wishing to honor David Heller’s memory can contribute to the David Heller Summer Opportunities Scholarship Fund, c/o Academy at the Lakes, 2331 Collier Parkway in Land O’ Lakes, 34639.

McBride writes about ‘miracle’ in Lutz

December 11, 2013 By B.C. Manion

Karen McBride recalls the moment as if it were yesterday.

She was heading home from a computer class she was teaching in Tampa and had a million things on her mind. She was wondering how she could make the class better for her students. She was thinking about what she would make for dinner. And, McBride knew she’d have to make dinner fast because she needed to get her daughters to karate.

Karen McBride of Lutz shares her story of ‘Listening to our Angels,’ in ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul: Miraculous Messages from Heaven.’ (Photo by B.C. Manion)

So, the Lutz woman wasn’t especially in the mood to wait for a long traffic light at the end of the Veterans Expressway, where it intersects with North Dale Mabry Highway.

“I was sitting at the red light,” McBride said. “I was getting impatient because it seemed like the light was never going to turn green.”

She couldn’t figure out what was taking so long.

“There was nobody coming,” she said. “As soon as the light turned green, I saw my grandmother sitting next to me. Right in the passenger seat. She said, ‘Wait. Just wait.’ And so, I waited. I did what my grandmother told me to do.”

Not a second later, a car speeded down Dale Mabry and roared through the intersection, running the red light.

“I had no idea how fast he was going,” she said.

McBride is sure she would have been in the path of the car, had she not followed her grandmother’s instruction. The thing is, her grandmother — Margaret Wilson of Cohoes, N.Y. — died in 1989, 13 years before this incident occurred.

Initially McBride didn’t tell anyone about her experience.

“Even now, I don’t know if people are going to believe me. Or, they’ll just think I’m crazy,” McBride said.

McBride, who is married and has three daughters, said she decided to share her story during a family reunion in the Outer Banks of North Carolina.

“Somehow, somebody brought up the subject of guardian angels,” McBride said. “So, I told them my story.”

Since then, she has shared her story with her family and with friends in her Bible studies at Grace Family Church. And now it can be found under the heading of “Listening to our Angels” in the book “Chicken Soup for the Soul: Miraculous Messages from Heaven.”

McBride, who said she was honored to have the story published, said it gives her comfort to know that others can watch out for us even after their death — and she hopes that her experience can help others feel that same sense of comfort, too.